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a·lone·ness, noun
Synonyms
1. single, solitary; unaccompanied, unattended. Alone, lone, lonely, lonesome all imply being without companionship or association. Alone is colorless unless reinforced by all; it then suggests solitariness or desolation: alone in the house; all alone on an island. Lone is somewhat poetic or is intended humorously: a lone sentinel. Lonely implies a sad or disquieting feeling of isolation. Lonesome connotes emotion, a longing for companionship.
It has been quite the month so far!
I have been experiencing the joys of learning to live alone, with three kids in the middle of no where.
Disclaimer: (yes I am still a happily married woman!)
It has been a mixed blessing. I have learned to count on my dear neighbor we affectionately call "Bob the builder".
He is patient with my calls, my I want's and my desperate pleas to fix this or build that.
Little one LOVES him, and I have a sneaking suspicion she has stole his heart as well!
But in all this ALONE time I have realized things about my self, things I would rather not look too closely at. I realized I really like to be surrounded by friends, I like to be a friend, I like to talk to friends, I just really like friends.
I am not very knowledgeable about fixing anything. I mean who knew measuring was so important when building a structure, or that gardener snakes eats frogs, (we have "rescued" two so far) So I guess we sort have fixed that, minus the one without any toes left....
I mean really these things seem pretty simple to you, but not so when you are facing them Alone!
My husband has always worked long and hard, I have been blessed with someone who is not afraid of hard work, and for that I am abundantly thankful.
But when I lived in the City I had a whole social network, people who I knew I could depend on, those people were my FRIENDS!
This brings me back to here and now, I am probably just hormonal. I am probably just overly sensitive, or it could be that I ate 20 chocolate chips for supper. It may be watching the families at church, so close and "together", that has set me off, or it could just be that I am here again, facing another week of work, and isolation.
I look around and see the beauty that surrounds me. I see all the creations God has made so fragile, yet so strong. Take that little snake for instance, how small and inconsequential he looked but to watch him eat a huge frog one bite at a time, one leg at a time, yuck!
So that is what I have learned from a gardener snake, no less!
I am going to take life one bite at a time, (Chocolate chips, frogs??)
No, Life silly.
I will not let my feeling rule me, but by Faith I will live each day to the FULLEST. I will trust in Gods Plan for my life, surrendering all my cares and needs onto HIM who strengthens me, and EXPECT the good things to come!
Life is really too short to stay trapped and bogged down in the pits of lonesomeness, So there I am feeling better already, it is true that if you write something down it is cleansing, but the real truth of the matter is that if you give it to God he will restore you.
He has the power to transform our lives, and he is just waiting for you to ask, Will you?
So if you will excuse me, I'm going to have a heart to heart with my maker, I've got to ask for some friends on this side of the ocean, because my favorite ones are just a little too far away to help me rescue frogs and to bake for!
But if you guys are reading this you had better be coming for a summer visit! I mean it!
:-) I will bake you cinnamon buns......
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